Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Random Post, Yes Please

Somehow I've never written about this before.

Years ago.

I was living with a boy.
All of my stuff was his stuff and all of his stuff was my stuff.
We shared a couch, a table, towels...but not books, never books.
Or computers, seeing as we each had brought our own into the relationship.

Then one night, after many nights of our relationship dancing in a burning room, he came home from work.
And I knew it was over.

"And you left him, just like that?
It's the only way to leave. "I don't love you anymore. Goodbye."
Supposing you do still love them?
You don't leave.
You've never left someone you still love?
Nope. "

I don't love you anymore. Goodbye

And I left. I packed one bag of clothes, my books and left.
I crashed at The Best Friend's house. Which morphed from crashing to living with.
Life was swell. I lived with The Best Friend, I had a well paying if boring job, and a new fabulous artsy unique bird-like friend named Mareena. Who also happens to be a lesbian.
Pay attention, this turns out to be important later.

I didn't end up going back for my stuff.
About six months later The Ex tracked me down and gave me the stuff that was more my stuff then his.

One of those things being my computer.
Which I didn't bother to every plug in or turn on, since I had been using the communial one the best friend provided.

Fast forward four months.
I'm moving to Hawaii.
I propose a swap with my mother, my barely used desk top for my mothers crappy laptop.
We make the trade without me ever turning on the computer.

Two days later

Me - Mom! Hi, I can't talk long, what's up?
Well intentioned Mother - Hi dear, I was just calling...to see how the packing is going.
Me - It's going it's going.
....strange silence
Mom - So, Sam, how's your little friend.. what's her name?
Confused Me - Mareena? She's great. Why?
Mom - Oh, no reason....
Mom - Sooo is there anything you want to tell me about Mareena? Cause you know I love you no matter what.
Me - ?
Mom - Well, cause I turned on your computer today and there's a whole bunch of umm viruses.
Me - Really? That's weird. It was clean when I last used it. What kind of virus?
Mom - Well, Umm. It's a bunch of pop ups.
Mom - Of girl on girl porn
Me - ....................

Turns out The Ex decided that porn viruses would be a great way to make me miss him and want him back.
Turns out he was wrong.

It's funny now.
I'm pretty sure my mother thought I was a lesbian for a year until I brought a new boy home.

Saturday, June 19, 2010

The Three Words That Made My Day

Tonight The Boy used three words to describe me.




With a boy like him, no wonder I'm such a happimess all the time.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

My Current Motivation

UFC GYM part 3

So a few months have gone by since I started at the UFC Gym. Looking good. Feeling good. Not high school good, but that's because I love pasta.
And ice cream.
and pizza.
and oreo's.
Ok, my eating habits are shit.

But back to the subject at hand.

There's still only a few of us girls who like to play rough with the boys in kickboxing.
One of the instructors got smart and realized that with bikini season coming on, girls will shell out more money for more classes. So he started a girls only bootcamp. Just one hour, girls only, before the kickboxing classes start. Since my schedule has been bi-polar thanks to being in training, I decided to pass. But all the other girls decided to sign up.
Two things happened within the first month.
The girls all bonded.
And lost 15lbs.

I kept telling myself its not a big. I'm comfortable with how I look. The Boy is certainly happy with how I look. I don't have time. Besides, I wear the "lone wolf" look well. While the other girls laughed and bonded before class I was mysterious and aloof.
And lonely.
With less ab muscles.

The girls were friendly with me. But they were starting to look like super models. And there was a tightness between them that only comes when you've been tortured in boot camp together.

But even that wasn't motivation enough.

Then one day while I'm stretching Miss Hawaii whispers to me,
"Is that your boy in the corner?"
"What? the fat guy? hell no"
" no, other corner. Him"
"Oh, yeah, he belongs to me"
"He looks good. Fights good too. "
Miss Hawaii says this last line while licking her lips. I look at The Boy who is doing perfect one handed push ups, then back at Miss Hawaii and her newly svelte frame.

I decided I dislike her.
I also decided to join the damn bootcamp.